The style of writing within For My Thoughts and on my social platforms can fall into two genres, storytelling and self-help, but to be honest, since categorising them I usually steer away from the latter explanation because of the stigma that still surrounds it in a contemporary environment.

We hear the words self-help and we feel an aversion; our natural response is to close off or shun to the idea that we need help when comes to ourselves. We are proud people, if someone wants to tell us how to do something, we’ll defend our own way of doing it, someone suggests another avenue to try, and we’ll refuse just so we can keep going down that same path, it is as if we need a devastating trigger to go off in our minds before we even consider opening up to the idea of another person’s recourse. We don’t want to believe that someone else may be right, because that would mean we are wrong.

It isn’t about being right or being wrong, it is about having options and choices, and being reminded of that.

I enjoy reading books of this nature, due to my own battles with depression, expectations, and society. I also love reading memoirs, learning about how others lived, what their reasons were for living and what I could take for my own journey in life. This also incorporated with my longstanding ambition for fictional screenwriting and character development, all play into a bigger picture for my fascination with the human condition, and as I continue to write my goal is delve deeper and share my thoughts as I go.

How could she possibly help me?

If we are open-minded enough to read, listen, or watch another’s perspective on life and take heed when living our own, another factor comes into play, who? Who should we listen to? Why should we listen to them? What makes them the expert? These days, it seems Instagram has given us a cheat sheet when it comes to credentials (she loosely says), we may come across a page and like a quote, phrase, or insight, but our first engagement is to see how many followers they have , and if we’re not impressed our interest is instantly lost.

Popularity, lifestyle, age, and appearance all play a part when it comes to believing in someone enough to believe in the words and actions they share, if they haven’t got it all figured then, what could I learn for it? The phrase ‘the journey is the destination comes to mind’. No one has it all figured out; if they tell you they do, they’re lying, they too are too proud to admit they also struggle in coping with a part of their life, we all do, and this expectation that we shouldn’t is what is affecting most people’s pursuit of happiness.

Our view on self-help needs a new vantage point so we can start seeing it differently and see the advantages it has to offer anyone on any walk of life. My own personal adaption is to be vulnerable for you, to invite you in and tell you things, much like a conversation but instead leaves you contemplating about your life and the experiences and emotions that you have, through simple stories that supply thought-provoking significance. None of this is about me knowing you, me helping you, or me believing I know what is best for you, it is about invoking the idea of helping yourself. We all know what is best for us, it is just sometimes we just need to be pointed in the right direction or be reminded of what we are capable of.

Self-help shouldn’t be about someone telling you something, it should be a journey of showing and sharing, the rest is up to you.

Ms. Tales